Lady Bird

Film Title

Lady Bird


A look at the final year of high school for Lady Bird and a million other girls.


Greta Gerwig


Saoirse Ronan
Odeya Rush
Laurie Metcalf
Timothee Chalamet
Lucas Hedges
Beanie Feldstein
Tracy Letts

Let it go.

(It’s award consideration season and I’m playing catch-up. As I tear through them, I thought I’d try mini-reviews. Enjoy!)

For about eight minutes, some hay was made about Lady Bird breaking a record for the most positive consecutive reviews without a negative review on Rotten Tomatoes. Then, a single film critic gave it a negative score out of a combination of spite and thinking the film was merely okay and the Internet pooped its collective Pampers. There is a lot to unpack with this situation, but I’ll save that for another time (*cough* year-end-review *cough*). After watching Lady Bird myself, I can definitively state that I am not a teenaged girl. I checked. Lady Bird is a coming-of-age tale about a high school senior, Lady Bird (Saoirse Ronan).

That’s it; that’s the whole movie. Lady Bird is your stereotypical (or typical) female teenager – she hates her mom (Laurie Metcalf), wants to go to college on the opposite side of the country from her mom, falls in love with different boys, has a falling out with her best friend over stupid teenager shit, and sucks at math. Since I am not a teen-aged girl (I checked again) and am good at math, I can only relate passively with Lady Bird on most of her issues, though I can sympathize because I knew some of those girls. It reminded me a lot of Napoleon Dynamite, but without the quirkiness of Napoleon Dynamite. For all those reasons, I couldn’t generate more than mild interest in what was happening on screen (just like with Napoleon Dynamite). Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t mostly bored by this film because it was about a teenaged girl. I was mostly bored because that teen-aged girl was barely interesting. I’m not saying the movie isn’t good, just that I’m not the intended audience. But also, what is that smell?

Rating: At the risk of causing another stink (ha ha), unless you are a teen-aged girl, ask for three dollars back.

(Note: GOAT reviewed Lady Bird in far more detail and is also not a teen-aged girl.)

About Kevin

Kevin is a cyber security engineer who somehow managed to become a bonafide movie critic - joining the Denver Film Critic Society in 2016 - despite being that guy that screening reps are afraid to ask "so, what'd you think of the movie?" Oh, he'll tell you alright, but it might take thousands of words to do it.