The sports stories of the decade.

Agassi has become a giant in the sporting world for being the one thing athletes are never expected to be: honest.

Fucking Yankees

You know that unattainable beauty you see at your office every day? She’s an afternoon snack for a pro quarterback, so you can understand why McNair had to beat them off with his prodigious and oft-used member before ending up involved with a delusional club trollop who was looking for a sugar daddy.

Your tax dollars at work

He cold-cocked a deserving Kevin Youkalis, wouldn’t kneel before Peter Gammons, refused to do publicity shots with retarded kids…

When it came down to it, it really was everyone else against the Patriots.

When Alex Rodriguez signed his $252-million contract with Texas morons across America claimed that it would be the end of baseball.

Coney Island would make a perfect home for the cock. The place is a snapshot of a ghost world slowly being dismantled and left on the trash heap of American culture.

Joe Gibbs should just take the cross out of his ass because prayer and relying on Mark Brunell got him jack shit.