THE ABCs OF ATHEISM

“Life is: cutting your way out of the thicket of stupidity and on occasions when you have passed your bramble and find someone else’s, you wanna uproot that too.” – Chris Morris Agnostic-Almost an atheist, a Fence Sitter, Doesn’t know, doesn’t care, isn’t sure. All of these and more can be used to describe an […]

THE ABCs OF SALES

  To see the Top Ten Movies about Salesmen, click here. Always Be Closing-Always Be Closing, ALWAYS BE CLOSING! These are those famous words from Alec Baldwin in Mamet’s masterpiece Glengarry Glen Ross. If you have ever been in Sales, you have probably heard a speech like this one, but never has one been more […]

THE ABCs OF MARRIAGE

For Other Great ABC Rants click here! Attorneys– Eventually you will need one. Why are you starting off this thing in such a negative fashion? Why immediately poison the well? Well, in America the divorce rates are shrinking, but so are the marriage rates, so deal with the fact that there are twice as many […]

American Hustle (2013)

Film Title

American Hustle

Synopsis

Con man works for FBI and the Mob thinks it’s hilarious

Director

David O. Russell

Cast

Christian Bale
Bradley Cooper
Amy Adams
Jeremy Renner
Jennifer Lawrence
Louis C.K.
Jack Huston

If opening scenes are trying to grab your attention, this one certainly succeeds as we see a clownishly attired Christian Bale orchestrate a really bad hairdo for something like 5 minutes. Equally as shocking is his physique as the formerly ripped Batman has put on 43 pounds of mostly paunch. The plot of this film […]

Blackadder’s Christmas Carol (1988)

Film Title

Blackadder's Christmas Carol

Synopsis

Wickedly hilariously twisted Dickens Classic

Director

Richard Boden

Cast

Rowan Atkinson
Stephen Fry
Tony Robinson
Hugh Laurie
Robbie Coltrane

  I was browsing through my 10th free trial of Netflix, looking for the 1974 version of Black Santa when I stumbled across this unbelievable find. When I looked at the title and the cast, I dropped everything, yes even the morning micturation would have to wait. Being unfamiliar with the BBC series Blackadder, I […]

A Christmas Carol (2009)

Film Title

A Christmas Carol

Synopsis

Disney Animation of Dickens Classic Scrooge

Director

Robert Zemeckis

Cast

Jim Carrey
Gary Oldman
Colin Firth

I usually don’t care for animation very much,no matter how compelling, but I watched this movie when it first came out and thought it was pretty good. Upon re-watching, Ive changed my mind The movie is not only good, it is mind-blowingly fantastic. This version of the Dickens classic is directed by Robert Zemeckis, the […]

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Film Title

How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Synopsis

Overdone acting and overdone makeup. A dumbing down, instead of a shake up.

Director

Ron Howard

Cast

Jim Carrey
Taylor Momsen
Jeffrey Tambor
Christine Baranski
Molly Shannon
Clint Howard

The only character in the movie that was watchable was Max the Dog and this was because he had no lines.

It’s a Wonderful Life (1947)

Film Title

It's a Wonderful Life

Synopsis

No, it’s a Terrible, Terrible Movie

Director

Frank Capra

Cast

Jimmy Stewart
Donna Reed
Lionel Barrymore
Thomas Mitches
Henry Travers

It’s a Wonderful Life (1947) I rarely review movies that I genuinely detest, but I’m making an exception in this case. Think of this review as more of a warning than an assessment, if by some chance you have not watched this classic. I really dreaded re-watching the public domain issue of this pedestrian yawner […]

Christmas Vacation

Film Title

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

Synopsis

We’re going to have the hap hap happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tapdanced with Danny Fucking Kaye.

Director

Jeremiah S. Chechik

Cast

Chevy Chase
Beverly D'Angelo
Juliette Lewis
Johnny Galecki
John Randolph
Randy Quaid

“I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed…”

FUCK CREATIONISM

Evolutionary theory is the cornerstone of the biological sciences and without it nothing makes any sense at all.