NFL Week 14: It’s Only a Game Edition

And back down to Earth we crash. Some days you’re the stick, some days the drum. As per the rules I won’t apologize for anything but I will admit that I sort of stopped caring about the outcome of the Monday night game when the Ryan Shazier hit took place. It seems trite to say […]

NFL Week 13: Dow Jones 24,000 Edition

NFL Week 13: Dow Jones 24,000 Edition BREAKING: ENTIRE NFL IN HUGE GIGANTIC MEGASCANDAL, LIKE REAL REAL BAD; PAID PROTESTS, CAUSING HURRICANES, PUPPY MURDER, SLIDING INTO DMS, MORE. NEW YORK (RR) Based upon information gathered from highly credible and in no way biased informant, Ruthless Reviews has learned that all of the NFL protests were […]

NFL Week 12: The Iron Bowl Is More Important Edition

Thanksgiving is upon us! A time for gathering with friends and loved ones and telling tacky jokes about putting up with distant relatives with deplorable political views. Granted, that is the unfortunate reality for some people, though I figure the average Ruthless reader has enough intelligence and self-assurance to just avoid spending time with douchebags […]

NFL Week 11: Osweiler’s Agent Edition

NFL Week 11: Osweiler’s Agent Edition It is 11:08 p.m. on Sunday night. I am soberer than I would prefer, having outdone myself on a steak-and-potato nacho bake that starched up my stomach. This created a temporary but legitimate real estate scarcity, and beer now finds itself the victim of gentrification. At this point the […]

NFL Week 10: New York or Chicago Style Edition

Pizza? War? Pizza war? Indeed, the absurdities abound as there is apparently a pizza war in effect now, raging for the soul of the National Football League. The short version goes like this: Self-made Evangelical Christian millionaire and insufferable prick Papa John Schnatter, whose underpaid and uninsured employees make the official pizza of the NFL, […]

NFL Week 9: You Will Go Blind If You Keep That Up Edition

NFL Week 9: You Will Go Blind If You Keep That Up Edition It would be classless to eat an 0-3 beat two weeks ago and brush it off as part of a process, only to come back and scream THREE AND O, BABY! from the rooftops, so you will get none of that here. […]

NFL Week 8: Yes we are still playing Baseball Edition

So there was some killer stuff on the site this week, what with everyone justifiably going bananas over Blade Runner 2049, but did you get a look at Faststeady’s piece on Omaha Hi-Lo? I read it twice despite not being involved in a real competitive poker game against either man or machine since the heyday […]

NFL Week 7: You Knew What You Were Getting In For Edition

Hey, it happens. Gotta handle the swings, that’s part of the process. Remember, a very famous man of the cloth once said that a mans gotta make at least one bet a day, else he could be walking around lucky and never know it. We’ll be alright. Now, as is custom with most football gambling […]

NFL Week 6: The Oppression Is Only In Your Mind Edition

NFL Week 6: The Oppression Is Only In Your Mind Edition This just in: Mike Ditka sucks. Mike Ditka not only sucks, Mike Ditka is an archetype of suck. Mike Ditka is a caricature of a sort of outdated, humorless hard-ass father figure exclusively in the eyes of people who hate their fathers. He was, […]

NFL Week 5: Yes, it’s already Week 5 Edition

Rats in the cellar! The dreaded double deuce! Dot cinco goose-eggs. The worst of it is that I thought we were rolling early on, too. We nailed the Saints v. Dolphins game in London, even predicting the ugly nature of the whole affair. I didn’t see it obviously, because no one not addicted to cocaine […]