The war-iest of war movies. We’ve all seen what Christopher Nolan is capable of and it’s almost always been fantastic. We’re at a point now where “Directed by Christopher Nolan” is all that needs to be said to peak interest in a new movie. In other words, the opposite of “Directed by M. Night Shyamalan.” […]

Oh, dear god. Imagine if Jupiter Ascending and John Carter had a baby. Then, imagine if they used that baby as the ball in a game of kickball. Finally, imagine the two star players of the game had all the chemistry, charisma, and playing skills of the goose poop scattered on the field. That is […]

Kind of some obvious wishes did not get made. Sometimes, you have to be in the right mood to enjoy a movie, especially a bad one. Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been listening to a podcast called My Dad Wrote a Porno and it is arguably the funniest thing I’ve heard in my […]

Now we can argue about the best Spider-Man actor. Do you realize it’s been thirteen years since the last good Spider-Man film? Spider-Man 2 was the last good one and Andrew Garfield was not better than Tobey Maguire. Yeah, I said it. The Amazing Spider-Man was bland and Garfield’s portrayal was mediocre and not sympathetic. […]

Worst title ever? In the context of the film, the title makes perfect sense. The main character is named Baby, he’s a getaway driver for heists, and he’s really young. In the context of wanting to sell more movie tickets, it’s maybe the worst title ever. When I first saw it on the advanced screening […]

How to entertain children and adults at the same time. As a kid of the eighties, Despicable Me 3 managed to remind me of how completely stupid was that entire decade. Stupid clothes, stupid trends, stupid catch phrases, and some really, really stupid music. Despicable Me 3 put those things back in the spotlight, simultaneously […]

A run-on sentence, but with explosions. I’ve got good news and bad news. The good news is Transformers: The Last Knight is the third best (and third worst) movie in the franchise. The bad news is it’s still a Transformers sequel. Yes, you read that right and you are wrong – the first Transformers movie […]

You can take your stats and shove up them up your tailpipe. As a lifelong baseball fan, statistics are interesting to me, have been ever since I was a kid. I loved reading baseball articles that painted a fantastical picture of my favorite players doing seemingly otherworldly things and I loved how they weaved in […]

Prometheus (2012) The last time I saw a movie as incomplete as Prometheus was when I saw I am Legend. I remember leaving the theater after I am Legend being really disappointed and thinking there were twenty minutes missing that would have helped the movie make more sense. Lo and behold, the DVD included an […]

No, a different mummy. Did you know that Universal Pictures is launching a whole franchise called Dark Universe? Maybe I’m slipping a bit on Hollywood current events because I had not heard so much as a whisper about this until screening the first film in the franchise – The Mummy – Tuesday night (June 7). […]