Don’t worry guys, a charismatic black dude wins 4 years from now.

No, really. Fuck the marines.

Please stop, because you’ve somehow made K-Fed walk taller in my mind.

Drug dealers are America’s most unsung heroes.

I need a pre-pubescent boy to powder my wig and wash my leggings.

And as we all know, he has been largely irrelevant as an actor in recent years, more famous for his pathological brood than anything…

Beneath the public veneer of the grandmother in pearls – the humble, ever-smiling visage of a cautious, sweet-tempered lady of dignity and grace – exists a woman so vile, so nasty,

Oft-told tale of some reservation-bound, drunken redskin trying to outrun the cops.

Their spaceship is a gigantic, golden penis.