NFL Week 6: 1.4 Billion Chinese Don’t Care Edition

One of the crazier things about gambling as a hobby is the duality of emotions that come with the territory, so to speak. Sometimes you catch a break and you’re on top of the world, hugging strangers and tossing black chips at the stickman while the dopamine and adrenaline go flooding into your brain stem. […]

NFL Football Week 5: We’re All Animals, Just Different Cages Edition

Rats! Who bears the brunt of the guilt for ruining our would-be payout last weekend? Under normal circumstances, I would either curse the Falcons for giving it away, or hammer the Bengals for stealing it. Fortunately – or, unfortunately I guess – there is enough blame to spread around. Last Sundays fourth quarter in Atlanta […]

NFL Football Week 4: The FBI Has Only One Week Edition

There are those who claim that my picks went 1-3 last week, and to those people I would say: let me take a step back and explain high school. I was number one in the class. Im going to talk about my high school record, if you’re going to sit here and mock me. I […]

NFL Week 3: Brett Kavanaugh Only Rapes For Great Justice Version

Relax. Today the captive, tomorrow the conqueror. Those of us who subject ourselves to this chaos for fun and profit are used to the swings, but if you’re new, just stay the course and think long term. Though it would be nice, we are not going to win every game every weekend. Ultimately, we are […]

NFL Week Two: It’s All About That Bass, Not The Treble Edition

YOU LIKE THAT! YOU LIKE THAT! *Badass strutting music blares* No no, just kidding, same rules as last year. Pick whatever present participle you want, gaming, handicapping, gambling, its still a game of chance at the end. We don’t apologize for losses around here and we don’t show our ass when were hot, either. Today […]

NFL Week 1: It’s Even Too Hot To Play Tennis Edition

  I Am Part of the Resistance Inside the NFL Administration. I work for Commissioner Roger Goodell but like-minded colleagues and I have vowed to thwart parts of his agenda and his worst inclinations. It was a very serious thwart vow. There were candles. We even wore robes! Commissioner Goodell is facing a test to […]

NFL Preseason: Half Mast or Half Staff Edition

I am well aware that this is Ruthless. I’m not you, you’re not me, we aren’t all the same as each other, but the difference, it ain’t much at all. This really is, by the grace of God, a place where nihilists debate pornographers about pop culture (that’s not on the front page anymore; use […]

NFL Preseason: Meaningful Carnage In Meaningless Games Edition

NFL Preseason: Meaningful Carnage In Meaningless Games Edition Well, the world keeps turning, wheel in the sky, flat circle, whatever you wish to say about the repetitive nature of life, and the same holds true for preseason football. We’ve had our egocentric rookie holdout, our heroic redemptive comeback, the standard veteran QB speed dating, the […]

NFL Preseason: The corn is not even in yet Edition

NFL Preseason: The corn is not even in yet Edition Ladies and gentlemen, I am emphatically thrilled to inform you that I spy, with my bloodshot eye, American football on my television! My East Coast weather vacillates between sweltering heat and flash floods, body-cammed cops can apparently plant dope on you or shoot flashbangs at […]

Super Bowl L II Sunday: Ruthless Super Bowl Spectacular Edition

I type with eyes resembling a sink-submerged wine glass and fail, repeatedly, to convince myself that my autonomic nervous system is not spewing blood into my glottis at the thought of this, our last kickoff together, less than 24 hours away. My face is not flush. My lip is not quivering. Of course not! Its […]