THE ABCs OF AIRPORT, 1970-79

4,089 words ain’t nobody asked for.

THE ABCs OF DEATH WISH 3

I got a fever, and the only prescription is more Kersey.

THE ABCs OF MIDGETS

Inside the Lollipop Guild.

THE ABCs OF DRUNKENNESS

Moderation: The Drunk’s Three-Minute Mile.

THE ABCS OF HARD DRUGS

You’ve stolen cars and held pistols to heads but now you’re groveling to an abusive counselor regarding a sleeve of Fig Newtons…