ALIEN VS. PREDATOR

You can read all about what’s wrong with the plot of the movie on countless other websites, and rest assured it is retarded.

THE YES MEN

The Yes Men is not so much a great documentary as a great idea.

Alien

Truly awesome from beginning to end.

ALI

The funniest thing I heard about this movie was that Will Smith blamed Michael Mann for it’s commercial failure, which would be kind of like Dan Quayle blaming Pappa Bush for their loss to Clinton/Gore.

Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN

I feel like an idiot.

THE THING

Kurt Russell and his hat burn several aliens dead.

THE GODFATHER PART II

There are three things in this life that I can recommend without the slightest bit of hesitation: finding a job that requires minimal effort, finding a spouse that can engage in spirited conversation, and, perhaps above all, watching The Godfather Part II on the big screen as it was intended.

THE GOD WHO WASN’T THERE

The best part of the movie is the people he interviews who all maintain that Jesus is a load of bullshit.

GO WEST YOUNG MAN

A very entertaining little documentary about two filmmakers from The Netherlands

SPIDER-MAN

Wow! I mean, fuck me and wow! Spider-Man is an amazing movie.