STONE READER

There are three things that I will not witness during my lifetime:

STONE COLD

Bosworth’s mullet is fucking absurd.

THE STORY OF RICKY

Too easy.

STAR WARS REVENGE OF THE SITH

Yes, they spelled “shit” wrong.

STRAIT JACKET

one of the greatest camp classics of modern times

THE SUM OF ALL FEARS

Ben Affleck is immune to helicopter crashes.

SUPERFLY

My short, happy flirtation with the “blaxploitation” genre has come to an unexpected end.

SWIMMING POOL

Most people are going to remember the firm, luscious, inviting, drool-inducing breasts of young Ludivine Sagnier…

SWEPT AWAY

Not far enough away.

SIGNS

Signs is a good movie. Real good in fact.