>> The Shithouse

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Crank 2: High Voltage

Tough Englishman must keep himself alive by repeatedly shocking himself, all while finding the man who stole his heart. Just like Macbeth.

By Phil: April 21, 2009
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SUSPIRIA

What the fuck? I mean, what the fuck?According to numerous sources, it’s Dario Argento’s horror masterpiece. So why was ...
By Matt Cale: November 25, 2008
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TWILIGHT

First of all, what the fuck were you doing at a vampire movie for tweens? Tween girls no less?While ...
By Matt Cale: November 23, 2008
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I KNOW WHO KILLED ME

As much as I wanted this to be The Double Life of Veronique, I couldn’t imagine Krzysztof Kieslowski resorting to owl hallucinations…

By Matt Cale: January 26, 2008
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THE MARINE

Apparently, black men do not drive minivans. Ever.

By Matt Cale: February 3, 2007
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BLOODRAYNE

While jailed, Rayne is seduced by Sebastian and though she wants to bite his neck, he convinces her to make out first, which then turns into a wild humping session.

By Matt Cale: February 2, 2007
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DEATH WISH V THE FACE OF DEATH

Bronson loses umpteenth love interest, resumes human slaughter.

By Matt Cale: January 31, 2007
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RAISE YOUR VOICE

Hillary Duff plants one in the Shithouse.

By Matt Cale: April 12, 2006
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13 GOING ON 30

Hell, the young actress who played her as a 13-year-old had nicer jugs.

By Matt Cale: March 11, 2006
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ELEKTRA

87 minutes in — nude, unconscious, and covered in boils.

By Matt Cale: March 11, 2006