Category: 90s Inaction

The story of Stingray, a cage fighter who likes fighting, but loves marital rape. In fact, Stingray is so into his redheaded wife that when he rapes her, he actually thinks of the black guy he just hammered in the ring

  Is it even possible to articulate the premise? Unfortunately, it is. Seagal is “the most distinguished academic” at Yale, because it would be a bit of a stretch for him to be the most distinguished academic at Harvard. He’s so smart that he becomes a patsy for a Chinese drug ring who try to…

Can the premise even be articulated? Sort of. Mix Robocop with The Terminator and cast the robot with a big bald fucker that looks like Steve Wilkos. Add a real life kickboxer Don “The Dragon” Wilson as a human who is targeted by the Steve Wilkos which is controlled by his former employers (a senator…

The 3rd best Dolph film EVER!

  Can the premise even be articulated? With some difficulty.  This script had been in circulation for ten years and was being changed a bit with every producer, so there’s kind of a Chinese Democracy effect.  Essentially, Chuck is a private eye who is hired to find this old jeweler who has been kidnapped.  Some…

“What Seagal Does In Vegas, Nearly Destroys It.”