Author: Goat
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Mountain (2017)
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Read more: Mountain (2017)Mountain (2017) Before I wind up the 2018 Ruthless Christmas Reviews, I’m taking a brief break. This review continues our reviews about mountains and humans that try to climb them. In his recent review, Kevin continued the Ruthless disdain for mountain climbers, rock climbers and other dare-devils that foolishly fuck with Mother Nature with Free…
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Santa Jaws (2018 SyFy)
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Read more: Santa Jaws (2018 SyFy)I have watched and reviewed my fair share of fish and Christmas Movies. Today was a good day as I finally got my cable back up and running after they replaced everything from the outside line, to the set. I decided to celebrate by finding the cheesiest Christmas movie that I had not yet reviewed.…
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Christmas In Connecticut (1945)
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Read more: Christmas In Connecticut (1945)I’ve reviewed a dozen or more Christmas Movies this season. There have been good movies and bad, but mostly bad. White Christmas was pleasantly dated, but watchable. Except for Mercy Christmas, most of the horror/slasher Christmas Movies were just poorly made. Christmas In Connecticut is in a class of its own. This was the most…
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Krampus: The Christmas Devil (2013)
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Read more: Krampus: The Christmas Devil (2013)Krampus: The Christmas Devil (2013) O.K., that’s it. No more. This is the last horrible Christmas movie that I’m going to watch and review this year. Of course, I may change my mind tomorrow, but right now I’m as as firm as President Trump’s foreign policy. No more, I say. I really didn’t think I…
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Killer Christmas (2017)
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Read more: Killer Christmas (2017)Why, why, why do I do this? You know, I used to really like my job. I review Christmas Movies, so what could possibly go wrong? I know and expect to get my share of the stinkers, but this year has been unusually hard. This movie gets an immediate and uncontested 10.0/10.0 for sheer annoyance…
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White Christmas (1954)
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Read more: White Christmas (1954)Last year a friend sent me a copy of White Christmas as a joke Christmas present. I realized that I had never really watched this Christmas classic, or remember watching it, so I popped it in the ole DVD player last night. After the viewing, I had the feeling that not only was the movie…
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A Merry Little Christmas (2006)
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Read more: A Merry Little Christmas (2006)A Merry Little Christmas (2006), a.k.a The Town That Banned Christmas is without a doubt one of the dumbest, most unnecessary and incompetently made Christmas Movies I have ever watched. Don’t worry, A Meowy Christmas will always take its place as the worst Christmas Movie ever made, but this one is certainly in the top…
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Once Upon A Time At Christmas (2017)
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Read more: Once Upon A Time At Christmas (2017)Once Upon A Time At Christmas (2017) was a Christmas horror/slasher movie that featured a psycho and deranged Mr. and Mrs. Santa Claus. They found much joy in clocking people with axes and crossbows. It was quickly obvious that the murders were themed on the Christmas song, The 12 Days of Christmas. The victims had…
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Mercy Christmas (2017)
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Read more: Mercy Christmas (2017)I wasn’t expecting much when I fired up this Christmas Slasher cheese-fest. I had recently watched Scrooge In The Hood, and Mercy Christmas has an even lower User Rating from IMDB. Yes, the bar is low for Christmas horror movies. What I actually saw was a well-acted, hilarious, but bloody camp masterpiece. This Christmas film…
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The Christmas Chronicles (Netflix 2018)
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Read more: The Christmas Chronicles (Netflix 2018)Christmas Must Be Saved! This is the timeless and hackneyed theme of most Christmas Movies, good and bad. From iconic classics like The Miracle on 34th Street, to horrible dreck like Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny, Christmas MUST be saved! This time, we don’t have the bumbling Ernest or the magnificent Death saving Hogswatch…